Today, the real Panama began in earnest. Enough of the luxuries of Gamboa Resort! Done with the A/C and the bar and the television and the odd tourists from far flung countries! Through with comfort and complacency!

Wake up at 5:45, shower, run up to the conference room to make sure that the 8 laptops were not stolen last night even though my paranoid falling asleep fantasy has the IT manager of the resort (guy with key) conspiring with the guy who rented me laptops to sneak into the locked conference room late at night and steal them, causing us to have to pay far far more than rental fees to reimburse the cost. All laptops accounted for. 6:45 finds me eating a huge breakfast of toast, sausages, scrambled eggs (runny, like South Americans seem to like it), papaya, cereal and coffee. Fully charged up, I dash to my room at 7:30, grab my far-too-many-for-one-man luggage, then grab the 8 laptops and emerge at the front desk, laptop bags swinging from every limb, and then some.

L., our uber-expedition coordinator rushes us all into a waiting open-air coach, similar to the tour trolleys on MV: open air benches. The coach is used by the resort for tours so there is a very confused looking old couple in the front seat, expecting a relaxing ride down the rainforest’s paved roads. Instead they are greeted by several large American men throwing 50-pound A/V gear Pelican cases all around them. Speaking of boozing and whoring, we thoroughly shock them as the driver pulls away.

10 minutes up the canal road, we come to the dock and meet our ferry to BCI. It’s small, probably about the size of the really small boat that runs to Oak Bluffs in the summer. Smaller than the Schamonchi for sure. We tear down the canal at a good pace, arriving at BCI about 45 minutes later. We unload and get our introductory speech from L.

Apparently I should be worried about ticks and chiggers (referred to as chicks and tiggers by them and now me, from now on) but I should be far more worried about dehydration. Our doctor says that we need to drink far more water than we ever have, plus salt and Gatorade. Word among the video crew is that they’ve been borderline passing out several times a day, and not the good kind of passing out.

We also learn of bugs not to touch and things that will send us to hospitals. I won’t bore you with details, but for all of you out there who are maternally inclined, my room is right next to our doctor’s room, which doubles as the infirmary. So do not worry, if I should be bitten or slip and fall, I have a doctor nearby to pronounce me dead very quickly!

I then set out in hardcore IT-guy mode (which I haven’t done for years) and rapidly set up a network in the conference room. Our internet comes from Texas, up to a satellite we’re commandeering, down to a big dish on our barge, converted to ethernet, converted to T1, and converted again to ethernet. Fun huh?

As you can tell, the internet is working, which means the initial part of my job is nearing the end. The rest will come soon, like a deluge.

So far no massive animal run-ins. Although upon arrival I was confronted by a wild-eyed Dr. Roland Kays emerging from the underbrush saying, “I’ve just caught an ocelot, I need a video camera!” Luckily I pointed him to about 4 professional cameramen just around the corner. I did not see the ocelot, though I will see many I’m sure. Word has it that the ocelot was very pissed, and pissing.

On the way to my “room” I had to step over several swarms of leaf-cutter ants, all happily carrying and waving their little leaf pieces. I felt guilty about stepping on them but it was very hard to avoid all of them. May their martyred souls rise to heaven where the great Allah will provide many leaf-cutter ant virgins for them

Just as I was complaining about no animals though, a massive roar came from above my head and there was a howler monkey complaining about something extremely loudly. He was about 100m away though.

Of particular interest to some of my friends out there: we have our own hired security guards with pistols. We must wear our badges at all times our else things can get interesting. Even more cool, BCI is a nature preserve and poaching is a big problem. Apparently there are some very stealth rangers out here who slip through the night undetected, with full camo and armed with some serious firepower. They even have a super quiet boat that allows them to jet around the island and kill poachers (well, maybe arrest them, but out here they do tend to shoot first, plenty of poachers have “disappeared”).

So now it is evening, dinner comes soon. My updates will become shorter I’m sure, but I will try to keep them coming. The only entertainment is likely hanging out with the satellite and video guys down on the barge watching their pirated feed of the SciFi channel. Boy, I sure could go for some Babylon 5 right now.